Tag: mental health

Sorry, NOT Sorry

Sorry, NOT Sorry

The older I get, the more things I notice about myself and others. I notice that I say,’ ‘I’m Sorry’ A LOT; Almost as a greeting.  Examples: excuse the background, or excuse the stuff on my front seat or apologize for an autocorrect error (Darn Autocorrect).  I’ve noticed that when people get in my car, unless you the bestie, I usually preface the entering of my car by saying, “Excuse the mess.”

There has been  times recently when I apologize for things I shouldn’t be apologizing for. For the last couple of years, I’m usually the youngest employee at whatever company I’m currently working for. I do my best to be a helpful and dependable team member. This usually gets noticed by the higher ups. Recently, that has led to a promotion. With the promotion came more responsibilities and having a leadership role over others. I have mentioned in a previous blog post that sometimes being young can lead others to test boundaries with me, which in turn has led me to test boundaries of my own 😉 During this time, I found when myself apologizing for how people were perceiving the words that came out of my mouth. I had to take a step back and realize that I shouldn’t be apologizing for a statement or action if I know that the intent was not meant to be malicious. How tiring is it to make sure that every word you say doesn’t offend a person or rub them the wrong way??

I would have to take a perpetual vow of silence.

When I really started to analyze my frequency of apologizing, I began to wonder if this was more a women issue that men. I honestly don’t see men apologizing on a regular basis. Is it engrained in women, in general, to not want to upset anyone, to not make anyone mad???

I’ve seen some of my social media friends apologize or feel the need to explain any background or picture that is not perfect. Damn That. I am not perfect. My car is not detailed on a regular basis. My hair doesn’t always stand up Kid’N Play-ish like I would prefer all the time.

I am imperfect. Like it or stroll on. I am in love with who I’m becoming which mean I have to be okay with what’s real. Trying to be perfect is an illusion and damn tiring.

How often do you apologize in a day??

Growing, Stretching, Day by Day.

 

Until Next Time,

 

DaniGee

Culture of Work *Wellness Wed.*

Happy Spring! I feel joyful every time I see the grass becoming a little bit greener, the birds chirping a little bit louder, and the day lasting a little bit longer.

I am happy that I have a great group of friends that I can vent to when things feel a little bit overwhelming with work and/or personal issues. I’ve been doing that more when it comes to work issues. I was recently promoted and with that came more responsibility. With that being said,

I HATE CONFLICT.

If anyone knows me personally, they know that I am a laid back, don’t bother anyone, wants everyone to laugh and have a good time. I try to be genuine in all aspects of my life. How you meet me is pretty much how you will always see, well, except I’ll probably become louder the more comfortable I get around you. This demeanor is the same that I try to bring into the workplace. I understand that we spend a great deal around people who we may not have chosen but we are in a place where we have to all work for a certain mission. Why make it more difficult that it has to be?

I’ve encountered issues that I extremely dislike within this new position: conflict, passive aggressiveness, and feeling the need to be on the defensiveness. The majority of the time when conflict arises at work, my initial thought is this:

Image result for my man got two jobs meme

Even though I have no man and no 2 jobs. However it makes me feel good to say it.

I usually hopes it goes away on its own but this issue wasn’t. It was actually getting worse. I had a person who honestly wasn’t seeing me as a person with any authority or any say so on the day to day operations. I never wanted to come across as being anything more than a source of information. I realized with this situation, I could not ignore, it had to be addressed directly.

That scared the mess out of me. I would have to be confrontational, direct. I would surely burst into flames. I didn’t. The meeting went a little better than I thought and more importantly I was proud of myself for not being passive and allowing things to build up to the point of no return.

Self-care is important in all areas of your life. It is important to be speak up for yourself and don’t let kindness be a weakness.

Have you ever had conflict at work? Were you able to handle it in a way that didn’t compromise your integrity and/or your morals?

Until Next Time,

DaniGee

Worrywart

anxiety

Happy Friday!

I am trying to be more consistent with my blogging so I decided a perfect time to discuss an issue that seems to be a daily occurrence in my life.

ANXIETY.

That quote so simply put in to words my life most days.

I can not remember not having anxiety. Like ever. One of my earliest memories is me being in first grade crying my eyes out because my sister is starting Kindergarten and I worried about others being mean to her. It haunts me. It’s not too many days that I don’t have some sort of anxiety. Am I doing good job? Will I ever get out of debt? Why is my car making that noise?  The best way I know how to explain is that it would be easier for you to tell me to stop breathing than to stop worrying.

Some days are better than others. For me, the thing about anxiety is that I know how to stop it. Just stop worrying and give all of my cares to God. Even as typing that, I felt a sense of peace in that but it’s not long lasting. Why? Because I poke hole in every scenario. I think about the 1,000,0000 ways that it will go wrong. When someone talks about the problems, I genuinely give them positive advice and encouragement because I truly believe that God is working it out in their favor but when it comes to myself, I don’t have that same kind of confidence.

For me, my anxiety is lessened when I am able to focus on what I like to do and less about what I feel I must do. I feel that if I could get those two to be the same thing, I would be a happier person. I’ve decided to take an active step to help with my anxiety. It seems to be have positive results. I plan to get back active and learning more coping skills.

Does anxiety give you the blues? What do you do to coping with day to day life? 

 

Have a Great Weekend,

DaniGee